Monday, April 26, 2010

Basketball...The Gift and The Curse II

So what is causing me so much grief?

This year, the source of my despair and angst is the Denver Nuggets. Actually, for the last two years, it's been the Nuggets. I really don't understand how they are now down 3-1 to the Jazz. First of all, Mehmet Okur has a ruptured achilles tendon. Secondly, Andrei Kirilenko's not even on the fuckin roster. Holy shit, you get 39 points from Melo on 50% FG shooting and you STILL lose?

Where is the defense? Kenyon Martin, Aaron Afflalo and Chris Andersen are all great defensively. Carmelo is making strides. Billups is good as long as he doesn't guard someone quick (This is really only a problem if Denver plays San Antonio or Oklahoma City). Lawson is decent, but he's my height. Sooooo...it's like shooting over a tree stump. A mild nuisance, but it doesn't really affect your jumpshot...unless you're worried about landing on him and turning your ankle.

Why is JR Smith still allowed to shoot the ball? They should put a leash on him. Zap him if he takes 2 contested 3-pointers on consecutive possessions.

Why does Nene only take 3 shots? Is there anyone besides me who notices that Nene is probably the most underrated and most skilled big man we have in the NBA? HE ONLY TAKES 3 SHOTS?! Someone kill me. Despite his height issues, Lawson needs to play more than 17 minutes a game. *sigh*

You bitches are better than a 3-1 series deficit.


The motherfuckin Utah Jazz. There have only been four teams I have ever despised:

1) 1991-1995 New York Knicks

You know how hand checking is illegal now? Thank them.


As I touched upon earlier, Pat Riley nearly single-handedly ruined basketball. It was ok when Detroit did it because Chuck Daly was sandwiched between the era of Magic and Larry and the era of Michael. Pat Riley's style of basketball? Completely unsustainable to the casual viewing audience, especially once Jordan retired. Nobody wants to watch 77-74 slugfests. Even serious basketball fans who can appreciate the strategy behind the playing style grew weary of the skill-less brawn-based tactics of Pat Riley. They had no offensive game whatsoever. Patrick Ewing was good for about 20 points for 3 and a half quarters before his greasiness and profuse perspiration made him useless in crunch time. Pat Riley ruined basketball to such a degree that I have not rooted for the Knicks since.

2) 2000-2002 Los Angeles Lakers

Yo Kobe, remember when your hairline wasn't receding?


If it weren't for one of the worst officiated Games 6 and 7s of all time in 2002, the rightful team should have won the NBA Title, my Sacramento Kings. To be fair, my Kings did choke away games 6 and 7 even though the free throw disparity was 77-55. I digress...

3) 1996-2001 Miami Heat


Epic fights. Epic 79-77 48-minute scores.

The Late 90s Miami Heat were basically the same as the early 90s Knicks...except with less overall talent and a better center who did not perspire nearly as much as Patrick Ewing.

4) Post-Lockout San Antonio Spurs

I derive more joy from watching paint dry than from Popp's teams.

This team had EVERYTHING I hated in basketball. They had a boring star player who abused the backboard like it owed him money. A dirty defender in Bruce Bowen. A coach who implemented a playing style that is solely based on disruption, defensive junk plays, and a stagnant painstaking offense. A smug Frenchman for a point guard. A flopping swingman who I would like...if he weren't nominated for Academy Awards every year he plays in the NBA.


--------------------------

Since 1999, it's been one case of bitter disappointment and frustration after another. As it stands, the Denver Nuggets will simply be the latest in a long line.

However, no NBA team loss has scarred me more than the loss of the 2002 Sacramento Kings.

The Greatest Tragedy in NBA History.
TRIVIA: 3 of these players are Black, can you guess which 3?


The Kings represented everything that was right about the NBA. The best passing front court of all time. A fantastic point guard who was clutch when it mattered. Deadly outside shooting. Great team rebounding and a defensive stopper in Doug Christie. The best run motion offense of the decade.

Most importantly, they had my favorite NBA Player not named Michael Jordan, Chris Webber. To this day, I will defend to my death that Chris Webber was the most skilled big man the NBA ever had. He was 6'10", could dribble, run the fast break, pass, run the motion offense without a top tier point guard, shoot from anywhere within 20 feet, rebounded, defended, blocked shots. He did everything...except when it mattered. *sigh*

Dear Basketball Gods,

Why have you forsaken me so? Have I not served as a good ambassador to the game? What more can I do to get a team I like to win a title?....


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